Welcome to "chuff to bits"! My blog about food, crafting, and other wonderful things! Stay tuned to find out what!

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Ha! Fooled you!

You thought I would post like I said I would, didn't you?


I never do that.

Today I plan to clean....but first, I need to watch Hoarders:

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Hmmm, how does that happen?

Well, today was apparently a 2 post day.  Hmmm.  How about I try to make tomorow a two post day to make it up to you.

Today we'll try something I saw on another blog.  Type "Unfortunately, ______" into Google, replacing the blank with your name.  Then check out the sentences from the results.  Vastly entertaining.

Tried it with my name, and some of the good answers are:

Unfortunately, Amber, since you are blocked, once you click send that message is gone for good.

Unfortunately, amber is not forever.

Unfortunately, Amber is killed by Blue during his speech on the bond that Blue and the girls of the brothel share.

And, my personal fav:

Unfortunately Amber forcefields do not contain proper ff parameters for silicon.

Friday, January 27, 2012

While I Work

Work is one of those strange things.  If you have an office, like I do, and you're in it daily, you probably decorate it with something.  Maybe one thing, maybe lots of things, inconsequential things, or meaningful things.   Some combination of all of the above maybe?

There are a number of things, on and around my desk, I'd like to show you:

My mousepad and wrist rest.  I heart penguins.

Ceiling cat is watching you.

The candle came with my original office, the pylon was a gift from a friend at a safety training session, and the ball......well.....  there's no explanation for the ball.

My pet fish.  Oh the joys of having an office.

Severed arm on top of a control panel.  You never know when you might need a severed arm.


Shhhh, I'm sleeping!

No, actually I'm at work, but I wish I was sleeping, I'm awfully tired.  Just a couple more hours. 

What's that?  I forgot to post yesterday you say?  That's right, you guessed it, I was sleeping.

I even went to sleep early.  I hate being an insomniac.  It takes so long to fall asleep, and when I wake back up again I exist in this fuzzy area where I'm not quite fully asleep for hours afterwards.

I hope I get more sleep tonight.....after I post something else, of course.

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Mini Honey Oranges

So these tiny oranges have shown up in our grocery store and I am fascinated by them.  They're so cute, and small, and delicious.

Think small, really really small.  Like oranges that are an inch and a half across.

Aren't they cute?

Everybody needs tiny oranges.  You should go get some.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012


Some times I wonder how kids these days make it through.  They can't be failed or marked wrong anymore, so they wander around with this smug little self-righteous attitude. 

This isn't just talk.  I see it every day where I work.  I'm amazed that some of these kids managed to get into University. 

Case in point, there's a door at the end of the hallway where I work.  It says "Authorized Personnel, Performers & Staff Only".  It's often locked.  Students try it anyway.  The handle doesn't move.  You'd think that would be enough to cause them to turn around and walk away.  Nope, it's not.  They continue to rattle the handle and pull on the door, they pull on the door hard enough that it comes out a little at the bottom, naturally that spurs them to try harder.  Some of them are strong enough to break the door open that way.  Often they give that up and resort to banging on it, or even kicking it.

Far be it from them to think that perhaps the door is locked because we don't want them in there.

Sometimes the door IS actually unlocked, still they repeat the same process, simply because they don't turn the handle enough to unlatch the door.

The worst offenders? Students who don't want anything behind the door, they just want to use the hall as a convenient cut-through to the Timmies.

I put up this sign almost a year ago:

It doesn't work.

Monday, January 23, 2012

Some Random Things

Every so often.....actually...VERY often....  I'm gonna post some random images.  There's no good reason.  It just takes a LOT of work to come up with a coherent post every day.  So here's some interesting photos:

I think you have to be a part of "Leaf Nation" to get why this is hilarious.
Big guy, tiny bike.  How is that NOT funny.
The reverse.  Big chair, tiny person.  That's me sitting in that chair.

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Glitter Crisis!!!

I was going to write today about something completely different, a post I've been working on for quite awhile, years even.....but I got distracted....by glitter.

Now, my being distracted by shiny things is nothing new at all.  However, at this point in time, I'm in the midst of a glitter crisis.  (First world problem, I know).

Anyway, here's the deal.  I have a bunch of snowglobes in my shop.  They take days to complete, literally.  The real problem is that I haven't perfected them yet.  The first few turned out beautiful, gorgeous, and lovely,  then one turned a funny colour.  I wrote about that before, and what it essentially means is that they all take FAR longer now to finish, as I have to be extra careful.  One recently leaked during shipping, and the penguin came loose.  I was horrified by this since I shake the snot out of them to test them.  I researched more adhesives, tested, and came up with one that is miles above the one I'm currently using.  Add a couple more days to the snowglobe process. 

All of this is inconsequential compared to the glitter crisis.  It's by far my biggest challenge so far.

If you love snow globes, like I do, you know that the most important part about a good snowglobe is the glitter "hang time".  Snowglobe show should hang for awhile before it gracefully floats to the bottom.  Unbeknownst to me at the time, I had stumbled on the PERFECT snowglobe snow:

Here it is, the elusive perfect snowglobe glitter.  I had no idea at the time what sort of problem this would cause.  When I ran out of glitter, I went back and bought a HUGE tub of glitter, assuming that one glitter is as good as another.  Turns out that's REALLY wrong.  I didn't float gracefully AT ALL!  It just plunked itself down on the bottom of the glass and stayed there.  "Ok, more glycerine" I thought.  Glycerine usually helps the glitter be more floaty.  Nope, no dice.  How tragic.  You can't have a snowglobe where the glitter doesn't float, it's just completely pointless!
This meant another trip to the craft store.  The problem, clearly was that I'd bought a different brand of glitter.  I'll just buy the same brand.  So I did.  Here's the original glitter, on the right, with the new tube on the left.  Same brand "Sulyn Industries".

Same brand, slightly different label, but should be the same glitter right???


It's completely different!
How can that be, why doesn't my glitter float?!? OH the FRUSTRATION!

Here's the original glitter, what's left of it.

Here's the new glitter.  Deceptively similar.

Need a closer look?

Here ya go, the original on the right, with the new glitter on the left.  See the difference?  Such a tiny little difference in glitter makes a HUGE difference to my little world of snowglobes.

This glitter problem spawned a widescale search for glitter, the perfect glitter.  I pulled out an old container of glitter, still the same problem.  I tried microbeads in two different sizes, but they were too heavy to float. 

I e-mailed the original glitter company.   I can only imagine why they didn't e-mail me back: "This crazy woman is complaining about the shape of the glitter she bought!"

I started to pull my hair out.

Today, THIS happened:

Yep, that's me in the midst of testing 7 different kinds of glitter against each other, the result of 4 different trips to the craft store, and hours of pacing through the craft store and shaking tiny vials of glitter while I scrutinize them.  Dragging each home,  mixing it with varying amounts of water and glycerine, and shaking the snot out of them.  It turns out that champagne glasses give you room to shake them without pouring glitter on your floor......oh the things I never wanted to know.  I still have no perfect glitter, but here are my findings, in case you were curious.  From right to left in the above picture:

Martha Stewart's iridescent glitter.  It mostly looks like shiny water from a distance.  It clumps together when you add glycerine.

Martha Stewart's tinsel glitter.  Interesting floating going on here, but snow just doesn't look like that.  I'm not sure I can get over it.

Martha Stewart's coarse crystal glitter.  By far the best contender, great float time, but looks like cloudy water when shaken.  Bonus, no clumping

Tulip's iridescent fabric glitter....well hey, at least it's waterproof.

The IMPOSTER glitter!

Martha Stewarts white glitter.
Tub o' useless clumpy glitter.

Here's the lineup again in case you missed it.

Countless others were discounted in the store, on the spot.  I guess I'm destined to roam Michael's on an endless quest to find the perfect glitter.

Listen, if you see it, I'm begging you to mail me some.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

It's Coooooold Out There! ....sometimes....

I'm writing rather early today because I work from 4pm to midnight tonight.  Ick.  Yep.  Not really looking forward to that at all.  It also contributes to my total inability to manage my weight (up OR down) since working nights means eating an extra meal.  I'm totally incapable of sleeping during the day so, while hubby blissfully dreams the morning away, (it's 9am here) I'm already up with my coffee, planning out my day.

It's cold outside, but not as cold as it should be.  It's January right now, and pretty much wherever you are in Canada, in January it should be COLD.  Not just "cold" but bone-numbing cold.  Freeze the water on your eyeballs cold.  It's not really all that cold here right now.  Now, I'm not saying I WANT my eyeballs to freeze, but there's also a surprising lack of snow.  For instance, check out this picture from February of last year that was in THIS post:

Now compare it to today, which is maybe an average of all the snow we've gotten so far this year:

I apparently don't take very good photos at 9am .....(mental note).   The dog and the black thing from the previous photo (it's a compost bin) are in the upper right corner.  The dog is behind one of the blurry parts....... Sigh....  I need a coffee.

Friday, January 20, 2012

Platypodes! The cutest platypodes you'll ever see!!!

A good friend of mine has taken on a mission of sorts recently.  Making platypodes! 

In case you're unaware (like I was!) "platypodes" is the generally accepted plural of "platypus"!  Don't google "platypi", it's not worth it.....seriously.  Just read up on platypodes on wikipedia.

It started with one platypus from a pattern from FunkyFriendsFactory, as a gift, and ballooned to bunches of platypodes!  I believe she's calling it a paddle of platypodes!  So I'll show you one, an especially cute one (not the one I want, because I don't want you to take that one), and then you'll have to trot on over to her shop (click here to go there now) and buy your own.

Her name is Portia!  How adorable is that?  She's so cute!  Just look at that precious expression!

Ok, maybe I'll give you one more, from the top this time, but just one more:

This one's Penny, and get a load of her cute little heart patterned fur!  Now, go read up about some platypodes.

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Good Reads

It's one of those days, you know?  It's a day I struggle with personally, we won't get into why.  It just is.

For that reason, today's post will be short and sweet.  I'm looking forward to sleeping. I'm going to curl up with a good book.  The book I'm reading, is one I've read several times.  It's called "Clan of the Cave Bear", and if you haven't read it, I suggest you do.  It's the first in a series about a girl cro-magnon human who is adopted into a clan of neanderthals.  It's great from a dramatic standpoint, as the girl's life in the "politics" (such as they are) of neanderthal life is played out.  It's also fascinating as a window into a prehistoric world, and attempts to answer life's deep philisophical questions about where we came from as a species, and where we're going.

I'm reading it again for two reasons, first, it's a good book , one that deserves to be reread every now and then, and second, for Christmas hubby gave me the last and final book in the series.  This series has taken the writer, Jean Auel, a lifetime to write, and I'm eager to learn how this story ends.

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Pretty Little Lights

So yesterday I was going through the SD card from our Wii, looking for the Animal Crossing pictures, and I discovered that the card was the one from my old camera.

So today I'm bringing you a set of photos from that card.  I took these at Downsview Park, it's Canadas first National Urban Park.  They'd set up a drive-thru Christmas lights display, it had gorgeous arches of lights that you drive under, with little things to see along the way.  It was really quite magical.

The entrance display.  If you look close you can see two little red tail-lights of another car beside the dolls little blue left foot.

A look at some of the arches further down the road.

The cute wreath arch.

Some Canadian arches.

From outside of the park Snowflakes, Christmas Trees, Gingerbread men.

Another view from outside the park.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Oh Virtual Life, Where Would I Be Without You?

There's a video game out there, called "Animal Crossing".  If you've never heard of it, I highly recommend checking it out.  It's probably one of the strangest, funnest, most addictive games I've ever played.  The premise is simple.  You move into a town, full of animal neighbours.  From there, you interact with them, while you shop, live, fish, dig for fossils, collect seashells, bugs paintings, harvest fruit, grow vegetables or amass sets of rare furniture.  You decide.

You have a mortgage (you have to have goals after all), and can pay it off to get a larger house to store your strange stuff.

The really fascinating part actually is how much programming must have gone into this game.  Almost everything can be interacted with, in strange ways.  The furniture for instance, is useable, sellable, moveable, tradeable.

Anyway, I could talk about the awesomeness of Animal Crossing all day long, but I won't, I'll just give you some pictures.

On New Years Eve there are fireworks!  You can see one of our constellations in the background.

Standing with the mayor (the turtle) and a neighbour (yellow bunny) in front of the New Year's sign.  Yes, I AM wearing a Santa suit and a green plaid eye mask.

Hipster hubby is fishing from the ocean under the aurora borealis.

Hubby, wearing a monacle, is watching me sleep while I'm logged out of the game....how creepy.

After watching other players sleep, he then goes after the neighbours, with an axe.

One of our other neighbours has an incoherent conversation with hubby....one of the drawbacks of being able to change the neighbours catchphrases or greetings.  They also learn words from each other.....

This man will teach you how to "emote"....terrifying.

Hubby stands in his garishly furnished living room and emotes...surprise?

Monday, January 16, 2012

Blue Monday

Well, they keep telling me on the radio today that it is "Blue Monday".  Today is supposedly the saddest day of the year.  People are bummed about Christmas being over, failed New Year's resolutions, and mailboxes stuffed with bills.

Oh....you know what?  I think they're right.

Today was definitely sad.

So, in honour of Blue Monday, I bring you another update on the plexi wood thing I'm making.   It's up on the wall, but it's not quite finished yet.

Blue thing.
There you have it.  It's difficult yo see in this photo but it progresses from green to blue, with some silver washed over it.  There's also silver just under the edges of the plexi piece where it insets.  I'm hoping to have some lights put inside of it later on.

Anyway, I hope you have a good Monday!

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Sloooow Sunday

 Today is full of puttering around my house, contemplating "THE BIG PICTURE".  So, I bring you little pictures. 

These three pictures hanging on the wall in our hallway were inspired by THIS blog.  She does it so much better than I did.  They're the lyrics to the song that hubby and I consider ours, "Moon River" as remixed by Kid Koala.  The lyrics are done in several fonts, printed, then mod podged onto 3 separate canvases.  If I had to do it again, I would use larger fonts and only a few lines. 

"Moon River" Lyrics
 This next strange looking thing, is a photo of what's sitting on my crafting table right now.  This very strange piece of wood and plexi was in our wood bin at work.  Plexi can't be recycled by our wood people, and I was really intrigued by it's shape, so it came home with me, and will now become art.  I'll take some photos when its done.

Strange art.
 Speaking of pictures, this last picture is a preview of what's to come.  I'm opening two new shops on Etsy, one for supplies, and one for vintage items.  This little baby will be the first thing listed in the new vintage shop "PenguinCache".  It's only a sneak peek though, you'll have to wait for the real thing.

Sneak peek at a gooooorgeous item.

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